Why It’s Important to Build Your Resilience

Ever wondered why some people can pick themselves up and keep going after a tough situation, while others struggle to move forward? Or why some people seem to come out of challenges even stronger than before? The secret is resilience. But what exactly is resilience, and why does it matter?

What Is Resilience and Why Does It Matter?

You’ve probably heard the word "resilience" thrown around a lot, especially with all the focus on stress and wellbeing these days. At its core, resilience is your ability to adapt, bounce back, and keep moving when life throws challenges your way.

People who are highly resilient aren’t immune to stress or fear—they feel it just like everyone else, but they’ve learnt how to manage it effectively. Take Sarah, for example. She used to panic before big presentations, losing sleep and second-guessing herself. But after practising mindfulness techniques and reframing her self-doubt, she now approaches them with confidence, seeing them as opportunities rather than threats. They feel the same pressure as everyone else—whether it’s a last-minute presentation, a tough conversation, or uncertainty at work. The difference is that they’ve learnt how to manage those feelings and respond in a way that keeps them in control.

Instead of snapping at a colleague when they’re under pressure, they take a breath and handle the situation calmly. When they start to feel overwhelmed, they recognise the signs early and take steps to avoid burnout. If they miss out on a promotion they really wanted, they use it as a learning experience rather than letting it define them.

Sounds good, right? The best part is that resilience isn’t something you either have or don’t—it’s a skill you can develop. A great first step is to pause and take a deep breath when faced with stress—this simple action can help reset your response and give you a moment to choose how to react.

How Can You Build Your Resilience?

Understand Your Stress Response

We all react to stress differently—some feel it physically with a churning stomach, while others respond by procrastinating or shutting down. The key to resilience is recognising your own stress signals early so you can step in before they take over. Once you’re aware of your triggers, you can start managing them more effectively.

Take Control of Your Thoughts

The way you think about a situation has a huge impact on how stressed you feel. Our brains have a habit of presenting worst-case scenarios as facts, making things seem worse than they really are. Learning to challenge these thoughts and reframe them can help you react more rationally and bounce back faster.

For example, instead of blaming yourself for something outside your control or dwelling on a mistake, ask yourself: Is this really as bad as I think? What can I learn from it? Shifting your perspective can make all the difference.

Find Healthy Coping Mechanisms

When we're stressed, we often turn to coping mechanisms that provide immediate relief but aren't necessarily helpful in the long run. Here are some common unhelpful coping mechanisms and why they can be problematic:

Reaching for Junk Food: While comfort foods can provide a temporary sense of relief, they often lead to feelings of guilt and can negatively impact your physical health over time. High sugar and fat content can also lead to energy crashes, making it harder to manage stress effectively.

Avoiding the Task Altogether: Procrastination might feel like a way to escape stress, but it usually leads to increased anxiety and a buildup of tasks, making the situation even more overwhelming in the long run.

Isolating Yourself: While it might seem easier to withdraw when you're stressed, isolation can lead to feelings of loneliness and depression. It also prevents you from receiving support and perspective from others.

Excessive Screen Time: Binge-watching TV shows or scrolling through social media can be a way to distract yourself, but it often leads to a lack of sleep and can increase feelings of anxiety and inadequacy.

Instead of relying on these unhelpful coping mechanisms, try incorporating healthier alternatives that can help you manage stress more effectively:

Physical Activity: Exercise is a great way to reduce stress. It releases endorphins, which are natural mood lifters. Whether it's a brisk walk, a yoga session, or a workout at the gym, physical activity can help clear your mind and improve your mood.

Mindfulness and Meditation: Practising mindfulness or meditation can help you stay grounded and reduce stress. Techniques such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or guided imagery can help you manage your stress response.

Connecting with Others: Talking to friends, family, or a therapist can provide support and perspective. Sharing your feelings and experiences can help you feel less alone and more understood.

Creative Outlets: Engaging in creative activities like drawing, writing, or playing music can be a great way to express your emotions and reduce stress. These activities can provide a sense of accomplishment and joy.

Healthy Eating: Instead of reaching for junk food, try to maintain a balanced diet with plenty of fruits, vegetables, and whole grains. Proper nutrition can help stabilise your mood and energy levels.

Real-Life Examples of Resilience

Including real-life examples can make the concept of resilience more relatable and inspiring. Here are a few stories of well-known individuals who have demonstrated remarkable resilience:

J.K. Rowling: Before becoming one of the world's most successful authors, J.K. Rowling faced numerous rejections from publishers and struggled with depression and financial difficulties. Her perseverance and resilience led to the creation of the beloved Harry Potter series, which has inspired millions worldwide.

Nelson Mandela: Mandela spent 27 years in prison for his fight against apartheid in South Africa. Despite the harsh conditions and long imprisonment, he emerged with a spirit of forgiveness and a commitment to reconciliation, eventually becoming the country's first black president and a global symbol of resilience and justice.

Oprah Winfrey: Oprah faced a challenging childhood marked by poverty and abuse. Through resilience and determination, she rose to become a media mogul, philanthropist, and one of the most influential women in the world. Her story is a testament to the power of resilience in overcoming adversity.

Resilience Is a Game Changer

This is just a starting point, but resilience is one of the most valuable skills you can develop for both your personal and professional life. If you’d like to explore this further, feel free to reach out and book a 30 minutes no obligation session here, I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Further Reading

The Secret to Building Resilience - Harvard Business Review. This article discusses the role of relationships and networks in building resilience.

Resilience Is About How You Recharge, Not How You Endure - Harvard Business Review. This piece emphasizes the importance of recovery in maintaining resilience.

What Leaders Get Wrong About Resilience - Harvard Business Review. This article explores common misconceptions about resilience and provides insights for leaders.